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The Diva's review of
Men In Black II (2002)


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Viewed at The Guild
Rated PG; running time of 88 minutes
Genre: Comedy
Written by: Robert Gordon, Barry Fanaro (based on the comic book by Lowell Cunningham)
Directed by: Barry Sonnenfeld
Cast: Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Rosario Dawson, Lara Flynn Boyle, Johnny Knoxville, Rip Torn, Tony Shalhoub, Patrick Warburton, Michael Jackson, Biz Markie


The Digest

5 years ago, the greatest M.I.B of all time, Kay -A.K.A Kevin Brown (Tommy Lee Jones), was sent back to civilian life. His memory wiped clean, he is enjoying his life as the postmaster general in a small New England town. Well enjoying might be a bit optimistic. He is surviving is more accurate. Meanwhile, over in New York, J (Will Smith) is still fighting aliens and still getting his butt kicked by them, but over all is the best the organization has, unfortunately he goes through partners like toilet paper. He finds fault in every single one and eventually neurolyzes them - wiping their memory clean and sending them back to the "real world". All of this is about to change because of alien named Serleena (Lara Flynn Boyle).

Serleena, posing as a Victoria Secret's model, is kicking names and taking butts all across New York looking for the "Light of Zartha". The keys to the light are a witness named Laura, who Jay has fallen for and didn't neurolyze, and the now retired Kay who had a run in with Serleena in 1977.

Jay must reactivate Kay to help him figure out what's going on, one problem though, Kay purposely wiped all memories of that 1977 event from his mind. So even though he's back, he has to follow all the clues he left for himself in order to solve the mystery. He has until Midnight to do it, if not things go horribly wrong for Earth.

The Dish

Hmmmmm. "Pbbbbbpt"! MIBII wasn't nearly as entertaining as the first one. The filmmakers failed the audience this time around because they didn't study their own history. MIB rocked because we hadn't seen that stuff before. We'd never seen those kinds of gadgets, aliens, weapons, and cars before. The fact that we were sucked into all the cool stuff made up for the fact that the plot was a little thin. Well they forgot to distract us with groovy toys this time. Because I wasn't distracted I was able to see how bad the story was. My lord what a ghastly plot.

The acting wasn't anything to write home about either, although I was touched by Agent Kay's show of tenderness in one scene. I was disappointed with Will Smith's cursing. Not the words, but the frequency of it and quite a few parents remarked how it wasn't this bad in the first one. That Johnny Knoxville guy was pretty much not needed. His character was a waste of space. And can I please ask what is up with everyone's grill in this movie? I almost got ill looking at all those nasty teeth.

The Directive

I'm having a really hard time recommending this movie. Even for a summer flick it leaves a lot to be desired. I don't know if you really should have to sit through 90 minutes of product tie-ins and marketing. It's this close to a red light.

MIB = MAB - Mediocrity At Best

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Copyright Kamal "The Diva" Larsuel-Ulbricht, 2002
ICQ: 8690410

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More 3BlackChicks™ review(s) for this week:
(movies reviewed week of 7/3/02):
The Diva's reviews:
Men In Black II

Bams' reviews:
Men In Black II

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