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The Diva's review of
Mindhunters (2005)

Mindhunters Rated R; running time of 105 minutes
Genre: Thriller
Written By: Wayne Kramer and Kevin Brodbin
Directed by: Renny Harlin
Cast: LL Cool J, Jonny Lee Miller, Kathryn Morris, Val Kilmer, Christian Slater, Patricia Velasquez, Eion Bailey, Will Kemp, Clifton Collins Jr.




The Digest

Jake Harris (Val Kilmer) is an expert teacher of a serial killer profiling for the FBI. He feels that one of the best ways to learn is to put yourself in a situation that forces you to use all the you have learned so for his final exam, he takes his students to an island where the will have to track down a serial killer with them is Gabe Jensen (LL Cool J), a policeman and tagalong who is observing how they work. They are stranded on this island, the seven of them. They must analyze the crime scene and figure out if Col. Mustard did it wij a candle stick in the Library – Okay, I just couldn’t resist. Anyway on this island are, J.D. Reston (Christian Slater) who has is in charge of the group; Lucas Harper (Jonny Lee Miller), the guy with the “big brass ones”; Sara Moore (Kathryn Morris), who has an intense fear of water; Nicole Willis (Patricia Velasquez), the tough broad; Vince Sherman (Clifton Collins Jr.), a wheelchair bound gun freak; and Bobby Whitman (Eion Bailey), the brains of the operation; and Rafe Perry (Will Kemp), heck I don’t know what his purpose is other than cannon fodder.

Right off the bat something is wrong. They actually start dying and horrible deaths at that. All fingers point to the outsider, Gabe, but is it really him? He is suffering just like the rest of them. They quickly find out that even if they stay together they aren’t safe. There only clue as to what happens next is a watch. They know that one of them will die at the time that is showing on the watch. Who and how is a mystery, but unless the figure it out, they’ll all be gone in about 24 hours. But can they stay focused and not turn on each other long enough to survive?

The Dish

Lord have mercy. Please? I want that time back, more than you can ever know. This movie is so predictable at times, that it made my head hurt, then once every 20 minutes or so, something unpredictable happens that gives one hope, then BLAM back to predictability. The only person of any depth in this movie is L.L.’s character – lord I never thought I see the day to say that! No slam on L.L., intended. His character has many layers and his onscreen presence was commanding. The rest of those folks just kind of fade away. No one seems to put forth the effort.

But I shouldn’t be surprised, actually. The release date changed 3 or 4 times. NOT a good sign. The other major problem with the story is the writing. The plot is intriguing, but the execution is left wanting. When it’s all said and done, they briefly discuss how some of the killings were committed, and implausibly so – then leave you trying to figure out what really happened. But after 30 seconds, I really didn’t care anymore and I think that is the biggest crime of this movie. It does nothing to draw the audience into its web. After awhile, you don’t care who is dying and how. You don’t even care why. That’s a shame because it had a lot of potential.

That said, I still got the movie. And honestly, it wasn’t about those jeans. It was

The Directive

Just wait for cable - if you must see it.



They should have been hunting for a script..

Copyright Kamal "The Diva" Larsuel-Ulbricht, 2005
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