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Single, Saved and Having Sex by Ty Adams


FLAVA that's still to come!

Walk Worthy Press/Warner Books

Ty Adams

ISBN: 0446578223
Published: January 2006
Official Website
TriCom Publicity Inc.

Author's Testimony

I don't really know if some people understand what that really means or even the power of having one. To even carry a testimony proves that a person has gone through a trying time, and unbearable trial or struggle in their life and they not only lived through it, but with great confidence, can square their shoulders, hold their head back, and shout with a loud voice, "I Survived it!"

Often times you find yourself in a place that you never thought you'd be. I never had plans to be a failure in life, taking detours and turns down roads that never were scheduled. As a little girl with pig tails in my hair, I don't remember saying, "When I grow up I want to be a loser, live a life without purpose. Yeah, I want to fall in sexual traps with men who take advantage of me and violate me as a woman, lose respect for myself…and yeah, I'll just take on a life without meaning."

No, I wanted my life to be significant but the roads I chose in my attempt to get this meaningful life proved to be the blueprint for failure. My life began to spiral in a web of sexual confusion as I attempted to find myself in somebody else's arms. I started looking for love to cover up wounds from broken childhood experiences and emotional holes that were never filled. The more I searched to find love in men, the relationships only proved to be escapism to cover up the deep-rooted, layers of pain inside of me.


I remember when the movie Indecent Proposal came out and the debatable question was asked: "Would you sleep with someone for one night for a million dollars?" Many of you would take the money without thinking. Oh, you wouldn't? Well, how much could someone pay you to cheat on God? If you're single and having sex, you're cheating on Him now without the money. I don't have to use my imagination to see what you might do if a million was on the table.

Many proposals were offered to me and I cheated on God, again and again. Man after man, bed after bed, one relationship after another. Do you want to know the name of the woman at the well in John 4:7? Ty. I was the woman with the many boyfriends-made-husbands. I was thirsty and none of my lovers quenched my thirst. I used sexual relationships to cover up the emptiness inside of me that had built up from childhood. I was damaged as a child by the hands of men who violated and sexually molested me. I was heavily exposed to homosexuality, incestuous relationships, and sexual perversion.

At the age of 13, my virginity was unlawfully and prematurely taken by a man seven years older than me. My mind was plagued heavily with thoughts of those who illegally tampered with my body. Not to mention, I was crushed and devastated when I found out that a relative allowed her 11-year-old child to be the victim of a perverted fantasy. This relative would perform any requested sexual acts with a man for money. She came up short when his fantasy was to have a virgin. Of course, she couldn't honor that request, and so she gave her 11-year-old daughter to him. This and many other sexual perversions among close relatives continued to haunt me my entire teenage years. I was disgusted and I vowed I wouldn't live the life of some of my family members . . . not knowing that I was already starting to live it.

Ty Adams
© 2006 by Ty Adams

Ty Adams, an evangelist tand speaker lives outside Detroit, Michigan. This piece is excerpted from her book, Single, Saved and Having Sex published by Walk Worthy Press/Warner Books, copyright © 2006 by Ty Adams. All rights reserved.

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