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A.I.: Artificial Intelligence


The Diva's review of
A.I.: Artificial Intelligence (2001)


A.I.: Artificial Intelligence Rated PG-13; running time of 2 hours and 33 minutes
Genre: Science Fantasy
Written by: Steven Spielberg (based on the short story by Brian Aldiss)
Directed by: Steven Spielberg
Cast : Haley Joel Osment, Jude Law, Frances O'Connor, Sam Robards, Jake Thomas, William Hurt, Jack Angel, Robin Williams, and Chris Rock (Cameo)
U.S. Release Date: 06/29/01


The Digest

Somewhere in the not-so-distant future, the Polar Ice Caps melt and cause most major seaboard cities to be washed away. In an effort to survive, the "gubmint" decides that certain precautions have to be taken. One of the precautions is to require people to get a license in order to have children. They've also created life-like robots to provide essential functions and services. The "gubmint" also managed to recreate a U.S. that has only 2 black people; A scientist and a very annoying "comedian" robot voiced by Chris Rock.

The creator of the artificial intelligence behind the robots, Professor Hobby (William Hurt), has decided to take it a step further. He wants to create a child. Once this child is activated, he/she will love you forever and ever. There is no going back. You can't just shelve this robot or give it to a shelter when you tire of it. The child is yours as if you gave birth to it.

David (Haley Joel Osment) is the first prototype. He is given to an employee of the company, Harry Swinton( Sam Robards) and his wife Monica (Frances O'Connor). The Swinton's have sort of (I say sort of, because he is frozen until a cure is found.) lost their child and are grieving.

A reluctant Monica decides to love David, only to drop him off in a forest when it appears that he means to harm her birth son.

David then sets off to find the "Blue Fairy" ala "Pinocchio" to turn him into a real boy, so his mommy will love him. Along the way he meets Gigolo Joe (Jude Law), a robotic prostitute, and they set out to meet The Wizard... I mean the Blue Fairy.

The Dish

Oh Lawd... 3 days later and I still can't wake up. Maybe this type of movie just isn't my thing. I was bored to tears by "Bicentennial Man" and this was a repeat performance. I felt bad because my heartstrings we're not pulled. I wanted to cry and I wanted to feel sad that David longed for his mommy. But I couldn't. I just wasn't feeling it. What I really wanted was for him to be turned off and put on a shelf somewhere.

I will give Haley Joel some credit. He is a child and this was a big role. I thought he was great in that capacity. Unfortunately, the story let him down. There were so many holes and it moved so unbearably slow, that I'm surprised there weren't outtakes of the crew sleeping in between takes.

I had thought to avoid Chris Rock this weekend. Imagine my dismay when he shows up in A.I, sounding like the rib boy from "I'm Gonna Git You Sucka". Thankfully his character was promptly disintegrated.

Jude Law was amusing as a 'ho, but not enough to save the movie.

And can someone please point out to me how they can create a robot, but they can't figure out how to find one and pull him out of the water?

The Directive

You might as well wait for cable.

3BC Ratings

flashing red light


The intelligence wasn't artificial, it was gone. .

Copyright Kamal "The Diva" Larsuel-Ulbricht, 2007
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